问题描述：
托福独立写作求指导,想了解写的如何,大概几分
题目：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: Businesses should do anything they can to make a profit.
Businesses searching for largest profit is un quetionable. However ,I believe , profit aside ,a company should put a premium on social responsibility. Thus they had better destroy the environment; exploit employees and defraud customers
Firstly, a company cannot damage natural environment . natural balance is fragile ,once its broken, thousands of years would be taken for its recovering. One typical example is that charcoal industry transfer rainforestsinto material resources. Decreasing number of both forests and animalspecies living in it trading for increasing number of fuel. The effect of which would remain several generations. Also,industrial waste pollute atmosphere and water system. Both bring trouble to our daily life . green house effects heating the earth ,invoking meltingsouth pole, raised sea level and hotter summer
Furthermore , detrimental to the right and benefit of workers is antherforbidding for every company. Mistreated staffs would lack enthusiasm and effectiveness or even go on a strike which do more harm than good to thecompany. On the other hand ,satisfying treatment engages the empolyees on adeeper level , in turn creates a better profits. Successful company like Google whose office is famous for its innovative design is a instance
Last but not least , cheating customers is the most serious mistake onecompany shall ever made. Cheating such as exaggerating the products in advertisementcould cause credit crisis. Once the inequality between the real product and theadvertised one is found out, distrust would expand as customers share their usingexperience with others. One’s statement is unpredictably powerful in the timeof multimedia.
To conclude,protecting environment , staff’s and customers’ right are important to acompany . The meaning of a successful business is not only immense fortune butalso the sense of responsibility to the society. One foreseeing business cannotdo everything.
如果不嫌麻烦,请把语法错误划出来,小人感激万分.
题目：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: Businesses should do anything they can to make a profit.
Businesses searching for largest profit is un quetionable. However ,I believe , profit aside ,a company should put a premium on social responsibility. Thus they had better destroy the environment; exploit employees and defraud customers
Firstly, a company cannot damage natural environment . natural balance is fragile ,once its broken, thousands of years would be taken for its recovering. One typical example is that charcoal industry transfer rainforestsinto material resources. Decreasing number of both forests and animalspecies living in it trading for increasing number of fuel. The effect of which would remain several generations. Also,industrial waste pollute atmosphere and water system. Both bring trouble to our daily life . green house effects heating the earth ,invoking meltingsouth pole, raised sea level and hotter summer
Furthermore , detrimental to the right and benefit of workers is antherforbidding for every company. Mistreated staffs would lack enthusiasm and effectiveness or even go on a strike which do more harm than good to thecompany. On the other hand ,satisfying treatment engages the empolyees on adeeper level , in turn creates a better profits. Successful company like Google whose office is famous for its innovative design is a instance
Last but not least , cheating customers is the most serious mistake onecompany shall ever made. Cheating such as exaggerating the products in advertisementcould cause credit crisis. Once the inequality between the real product and theadvertised one is found out, distrust would expand as customers share their usingexperience with others. One’s statement is unpredictably powerful in the timeof multimedia.
To conclude,protecting environment , staff’s and customers’ right are important to acompany . The meaning of a successful business is not only immense fortune butalso the sense of responsibility to the society. One foreseeing business cannotdo everything.
如果不嫌麻烦,请把语法错误划出来,小人感激万分.
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