托福独立写作求指导,想了解写的如何,大概几分

问题描述:

托福独立写作求指导,想了解写的如何,大概几分
题目:Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: Businesses should do anything they can to make a profit.
Businesses searching for largest profit is un quetionable. However ,I believe , profit aside ,a company should put a premium on social responsibility. Thus they had better destroy the environment; exploit employees and defraud customers
Firstly, a company cannot damage natural environment . natural balance is fragile ,once its broken, thousands of years would be taken for its recovering. One typical example is that charcoal industry transfer rainforestsinto material resources. Decreasing number of both forests and animalspecies living in it trading for increasing number of fuel. The effect of which would remain several generations. Also,industrial waste pollute atmosphere and water system. Both bring trouble to our daily life . green house effects heating the earth ,invoking meltingsouth pole, raised sea level and hotter summer
Furthermore , detrimental to the right and benefit of workers is antherforbidding for every company. Mistreated staffs would lack enthusiasm and effectiveness or even go on a strike which do more harm than good to thecompany. On the other hand ,satisfying treatment engages the empolyees on adeeper level , in turn creates a better profits. Successful company like Google whose office is famous for its innovative design is a instance
Last but not least , cheating customers is the most serious mistake onecompany shall ever made. Cheating such as exaggerating the products in advertisementcould cause credit crisis. Once the inequality between the real product and theadvertised one is found out, distrust would expand as customers share their usingexperience with others. One’s statement is unpredictably powerful in the timeof multimedia.
To conclude,protecting environment , staff’s and customers’ right are important to acompany . The meaning of a successful business is not only immense fortune butalso the sense of responsibility to the society. One foreseeing business cannotdo everything.
如果不嫌麻烦,请把语法错误划出来,小人感激万分.
1个回答 分类:综合 2014-10-10

问题解答:

我来补答
不错,目测独立写作4分以上,可能到4.5.综合写作听全要点,应该写作总分25以上.差不多27吧.前提是这是你在规定时间内能写出的水平.结构可以,词汇量不错,句法多边性也可以.
再问: 请问,如果想写到5分及以上还有什么需要改进的地方呢?
再答: 独立写作和综合写作有一个独立的分数表示形式。。。。满分是5分。。。我也就是4.5分的水平。。。问我怎么到5分我也不知道。。。你要是两个5分了总分不就30了嘛。。。29的我还见过两个,30的我都没见过。。。。能保证考试时能迅速准确的写出这样一篇文章,正常发挥拿26分以上就足够了。。26分已经超过几乎所有学校的写作线了。。。剩下的不如下工夫准备别的,听力口语考高点更有用。。。
 
 
展开全文阅读
剩余:2000
也许感兴趣的知识