第一句话： 我知道你想要写一个复杂点的句子, 但是你写的有点redundant, 而且有语法错误. 我建议你先不要写非常complex 的句子 从简单的开始. 而且你不能写coming from 这么写的意思是他从澳大利亚来（短期在那里居住） 并不是他来自澳大利亚
Correction: Allen Steward is an Australian born on Marth 7th, 1915. Allen broke the world record of recieving master's degree at the oldest age. Old as he is - 我不确定这是对的, 你要和你老师检查一下,你不能说 never late for a person to challenge himself － 这个是明显的指代错误, a person 可以是男的也可以是女的 你要是用person 的话至少要说 himself/herselfCorrection: Even at such a reverential age, he remained strongly determined of the belief that "It is never too late for one to challenge oneself"Correction: With the positive attitude on studying, . (这部分是对的), followed by a medicine doctorate degree. 博士＝phd or doctorateCorrection: Surprisingly, at the age of 80, Allen decided to turn his academic path towards law. Without a doubt, he successfully acquired master's degree in Law in 2006. Correction ...(前面是对的) . His efficient time management and organization impressed the teachers/ were aknowledged and recognized by the teachers.
总体来说还不错, 因为一般国内的学生写的都会按部就班. 我很欣赏你试不同的语句, 但是我还是要劝你把基础扎牢再往长难句写
