谁能这几则冷笑话翻译成英文

Once upon a time,there was a bird.Everyday,he has to fly through a corn field,One day the corn field cought fire,all the sweet corn has became pop corn!when the bird fly through it.thought it's snowing,he get cold to death.
One Summer,a giraffe met a rabbit,she is very proud of showing her neck "Ah,little rabbit,you know how good to have a long neck?you know just how fresh and sweet are those leaves at the top of the trees?,...you know when you drink cold water in the Summer and feel the cold water slowly flow through the neck?.oh."
The rabbit gave her a glance,just said:"Have you tried vomitting?"